All gifts I give my brothers are my own…
You know how sometimes it seems like you finally handled some burdensome circumstance of your life; have offered forgiveness to a particular brother or a particular situation, or perception even~ just to feel blindsided when seemingly the same problem, at least something almost like it, happens all over again? Back in the day, I took this quite personally. I told myself things like, “Something’s deficient in my spiritual program, I’m not doing it right”, etc., etc… This used to really frustrate me! That was until I realized and accepted the reason for it. And just why the similar ‘problematic’ concept serves itself up all over again…
Not only did I not want the problem; including the lack of peace that always characterized the conflicting state called “problem", which in itself offers a direct view into what I believe I am, and where I’m operating from at the time of my judgment… but, and importantly, because I can’t identify with my Self in this state.
It is not who I am in truth and the very act of ‘taking issue’ means I have forgotten and need reminding. There’s no other way home. And we do this until all spit thoughts are forgiven and all is seen with love…This is the condition of the Atonement. My responsibility is 100% accountability, at all times, to choose it for myself.
When I deny the actuality of the state I’m experiencing; when I think there’s a problem, and actually think there is an issue “out there” to resolve, it is simply a tap on the shoulder or slap in the face (whatever’s needed, eh?), which says, “Wake up! You’re dreaming and believe the dream is dreaming you”.
“Accept the dream He gave instead of yours. It is not difficult to change a dream when once the dreamer has been recognized”. (T-27.14.1-2) Always, what I’m dealing with boils down to the authority problem. It’s an authorship issue. ‘Taking issue’ is a symptom of the one problem: I think I am separate from God, (and all else): the same authority problem which fathered and characterizes the not-real world. So this is actually a gift to have show up so can look it square in the eyes and see its folly.
The seemingly, ‘previously forgiven issue’, apparently shows back up so I can see that I had my interpretation on what forgiveness was before. I know this because I had an idea of a result from my being forgiving, that would be give me the state of peace not available during ‘the problem’. ‘I’ don’t get to decide… and… There is no future peace! Peace is right here, right now! It is the natural state of my being.
Only from allowing myself to be present with it NOW, can I then let that state, where the Holy Spirit’s voice can be heard, to direct me as to the gifts I give, etc.
How convoluted is the ego’s idea of gift giving, yes? it’s always giving to get~ even if it’s to get spiritual enlightenment, yeah?
All gifts I give my brothers are my own… Due to the holographic nature of the universe, this is going be the case whether I choose littleness; to be hostage to the ego (disguised as ‘The Boss’), or host to God and accept my magnitude. From magnitude I can afford to look at the contradictions in my thought system and not take them personally, as with the littleness character; they’re just beliefs to be forgiven… they are impossible incompatibilities in the flow of peace~ blocks to Loves awareness~ not the truth. “I” don’t know what a gift is, what it’s for or when, how or to whom to give it~ not left to my own devices, that is.
This whole universe of separate special-nesses was the best ego/I could come up with. Here, every gift comes at the price of peace. So, for me, a good guide is to enter the day with the miracle worker’s prayer on my mind-lips:
“I am here only to be truly helpful. I am here to represent Him Who sent me. I do not have to worry about what to say of what to do, because He Who sent will direct me. I am content to be wherever He whishes, knowing He goes there with me. I will be healed as I let Him teach me to heal.” (T-2.18)
Now, whatever seems to show up~ peace is merely as close as my willingness. So too, is the reminder from the Holy Spirit to “Choose once again if you would take your place among the saviors of the world, or would remain in hell, and hold your brothers there.”… For He has come, and He is asking… (T-VIII.5-6).
Let’s join in the prayer for today’s lesson in communion with all our brothers through the Holy Spirit and God the Father as one:
“Father, I would accept Your gifts today. I do not recognize them. Yet I trust that You Who gave them will provide the means by which I can behold them, see their worth, and cherish only them as what I want”. Thanks for the gift of joining in a unified purpose…