Lesson 70~contemplationshare~

Lesson 70:

My salvation comes from me…. I am one who sought every possible, sneaky avenue, outside myself to transfer the responsibility this truth entails. Even when I ‘got it’ that guilt and happiness/unhappiness were an inside job, that no one could ‘make me guilty or happy, sad, angry, etc., still I was unwilling to accept the power of God within and as my own. But the Holy Spirit, on to my game, is always gently patient with his presence and guidance… And once I had truly made the decision for salvation, every means was employed for its accomplishment… Sometimes this came in what could only be called “inspiration”.
Much of the unveiling of my Self, however, seemed to come only through the excavation of the hidden, seemingly unconscious structure comprising an idea construct, which I came to label “powerlessness”. Being armed with the high-minded, elitist “we create our own reality” construct, I felt prepared to triumph. I was sure I could manipulate, add to, eliminate [whatever it took, anyway], to secure control over the thinking/believing processes in my mind and therefore my so-called life. This would, of course, result in peace and harmony and happily ever after (*note: confidence in the ego is confidence in ‘nothing’ –who would have guessed) … I did not see the need for excavation… and much of what came up felt almost blind-siding and certainly unacceptable, to me, as a self-concept. This excavation, if you will, brought me face-to- face with many ‘uglinesses’, which I responded to with utter shamefulness and secrecy ~ while I meanwhile, ‘I worked out my plan for salvation-through-control’… Oh my heart, it was a tremendous burden, I didn’t realize the extent of this weighty, burden really, until it was lifted from me and freedom was in its place… Thank you God, for the miracle: the perception that heals all perception… “I forgive and see this differently, I forgive and this will disappear”…
Okay, so here’s the thing I finally disposed into… The answer doesn’t come from me, although it is within my mind where God placed it, to save it for me; God would not have put the remedy for the sickness where it cannot help. “That is the way your mind has worked, but hardly His. He wants you to be healed, so He has kept the Source of healing where the need for healing lies”. Only the Holy Spirit knows the wholeness of the answer given by God, ‘i’ do not. Still, complete with guidance and oneness, all of it is mine for the asking. This is what does the saving~ I recognize I need saving and ask for the answer, already given me, and the power of God’s creation, re-members its completion in God. So complete and whole, in fact, that nothing else could possibly ever occur at all. I cannot access my salvation remedy as long as I attempt to do it from within this dream. So since this dream I call my so-called life is a projection from my mind, the return to mind is obviously the first order of business. I am the dreamer of this dream. Once that shift has truly been accepted, it is relatively easily to note the two exclusive thought systems: God ~ not God, Love ~fear, separation ~ forgiveness. For me, it required immense honesty to see that this one choice was really all choices, and all error had its origin in my choosing the one which wasn’t real. (Of course, from that a universe of total unreality spun out…duh, to see the movie now, eh…)
Okay, here’s the next thing: “The seeming cost of accepting today's idea is this: It means that nothing outside yourself can save you; nothing outside yourself can give you peace. But it also means that nothing outside yourself can hurt you, or disturb your peace or upset you in any way. Today's idea places you in charge of the universe, where you belong because of what you are. This is not a role that can be partially accepted. And you must surely begin to see that accepting it is salvation.”
ONLY the return to mind has any effect what-so-ever on getting me saved! All other tactics are basically futile and therefore a delay tactic… thank God, the Holy Spirit uses each and every miscreation; perfectly and seemingly specifically designed and orchestrated for each “special-me” ~to bring to mind the one illusion ~FORGIVENESS~ that heals them all and transforms what seemed like separate individuals and differences ~ into sameness and One mighty brotherhood ~ the Son as God created Him! …”God's purpose was to ensure that it did”.
… We see that the false is false and only the truth is true. Special relationships begin to take on the characteristics of the ONE-relationship with our Creator, all seeming gaps are bridged… what once appeared so tangible and real is seen for the shadow of the ancient thought long since past; till the only eraser marks of this illusion are left to show what was drawn on the screen of a so-called life and world apart for God. And we are not alone …We take each other’s hand and walk through the cloud of unreality together and with it the entire host of Heaven….a mighty force dispelling the clouds of guilt and all calls for Love. So, there ya go, ‘Within me is the world's salvation and my own’….